Dare I say it. I am almost scared to write it. Really. Every time I do it backfires on me. But here goes: We are really really having a wonderful week thus far. It is almost normal again, short of a few minor bellyaches or medicine reminders. Ally did wonderfully with going back to school. As I mentioned before, she was very hesitant. I worked out a deal with her and let her choose what she thought was fair as far as going. I wanted her to have some say in the deal. It was something like 2 full days, and then 2 days leaving right after lunch because they go to PE and she can't participate anyway. (and a hospital day thrown in). Tuesday, when I picked her up early, she was all smiles. Telling me about an awesome book that she got at the library and her friend Sachi got to sit in with her for both morning and afternoon recess. Just really happy. Then today, much to our surprise, she was so excited to go to school. Almost giddy. Well, actually, GIDDY. She had a little bellyache but was still so excited. The absolute highlight of her day (and maybe her year) was when the principal called her down to her office to help her with a project. She said "Mom, I got to type up a letter about collecting supplies for pets in need. And the whole school is gonna get the letter! And tomorrow we are doing the posters....oh yea, and the principal's daughter is going to be my sub tomorrow and I LOVE HER"
Seriously. Seriously. I could just weep I was so happy. Because all of a sudden she is just walking around the house singing, acting all silly, playing with friends etc. It is such a difference. And I think just getting her out of here for just a couple days (and away from me) has improved her mental state so so much. Because as much as this disease is physical, and it is very much so, it takes a mental toll too. I don't think people realize that so much. But the doctors always tell me...send her to school. If at all possible, send her to school. She can't forget how to live. And then they remind me that most of her illnesses come from "within" her body anyway.
It is still scary. I am still nervous about her picking something up. Today there was only a handful of kids out sick in the whole school, so I felt pretty safe. I am just always weighing options...balancing things in my mind....and ultimately trying to do what is best for her. Both physically and mentally. Sometimes she tries to push me...well a lot of times...she asked for a popsicle for breakfast yesterday. Uh, NO. And then she asked for a root beer when she got home from school today. And I had to pull out the "Allison, sick or not sick, we do not drink pop around here on a regular day" Sometimes I give in to her little whims, sometimes I do not.
I do hope it continues. I am fairly certain that her counts are going to go down and next week she could feel cruddy again. But for now, I choose to live in the NOW.
Although we are having this great week with our daughter...nearly nine months into our journey....my thoughts continue to be with Cory as he battles through his head injury. Still in a coma as of today. Jerad and I sit here and think it strange that we are the ones sitting home and someone else is standing by their child in the hospital. I really feel guilty about it. Because I know what it is is like and here I am just carrying on with an (almost) normal week. It seems not fair. So I just do what I can do and pray for him constantly. I hope you will too. His Dad did send me that picture I mentioned the other day. Here he is, still representing Ally's Army and showing the world how strong he really is.
I read this in my devotional book tonight and it seemed so relevant. "Sorrow makes us move more slowly and considerately and examine our motives and attitudes. It opens within us the capacities of the heavenly life, and it makes us willing to set our capacities afloat on a limitless sea of service for God and for others.....Sorrow will reveal hidden depths within, which were never before known or suspected...It takes sorrow to expand and deepen the soul"
Praying for them both everyday. And all of the other kids who are part of our hospital family and who are near and dear to our heart. Amanda, Alivia, Katie, Jackie, Lincoln, Maggie, Dave, Braden, Skye, Tori, and Bonnie. Livestrong.