Thursday, September 17, 2009

And so it is done.

And so it is done. The bone marrow has been collected. The spinal fluid has been collected. It is all in God's hands now and we will just wait. The procedure itself went okay. The doctor was ready early (shock!) and we actually went back about 10am. Dr Broxson was the one doing it today, although he had his resident actually do the procedure. I am all for teaching and learning for the next wave of doctors to come, but this was so important to us today I would have rather he did it himself. Especially when halfway through the bone marrow aspiration, the bone marrow stopped coming out and they had to drive the needle into her bone again. UGH. She shrieked in pain at that one. She actually cried several times throughout the procedure and even said "i'm scared" right when they were getting ready to do her spinal. They tell me that most kids sleep through the whole thing. But in typical Allison fashion, she does not fall asleep and even seems to be aware as to what is happening. And she definitely feels it, although I don't think she remembers it afterwards. I was not strong today. I try to be so strong, but this is just so pivotal to me. I quietly cried through a lot of it knowing that her fate (and mine) were going into those test tube bottles. If only we had a magic view into the future and could know for certain that all will be okay. It would make this next two years that much more bearable for me. I can do anything, and I will, but I just need to know she will be okay.

Right before my mom died, she asked me to go find her rosary beads. She hadn't been a practicing catholic since before I was born. I was sort of shocked she asked for them. I said to mom "why do you want your rosary?" and she said..."well don't you think I should start praying?" She knew she was dying and so did I. So I got her the beads and she held onto them...this was just a few days before she died. I kept them in my hands for a long time after she died. And today I kept them in my hands through the whole procedure. They were my great-grandmothers rosary beads. And now they are my treasure.

Ally came out of the meds pretty good. She didn't eat most of the day, but she has been getting a ton of fluids. She got a quick infusion of vincristin (a chemo) and then they started her on the methotrexate about 1pm. It should run until about 1 pm tomorrow. It looks like the biggest bag of mountain dew that you have ever seen. Look:

All of that chemo goes into her body. And it all has to come out too. She is urinating like crazy. Starting tomorrow, when this is done, they start giving her a rescue drug to basically help her blood to build back up. The doctor says she will be allowed to go home when her urine and blood meet their criteria...I think the methotrexate has to be out of her system. We are hoping for Sunday, but it could be Monday. I am already going stir crazy in this place. We did have a few visitors tonight...our Booher family and also Evan, Carly and Grandpa Barnett.
I spent a large part of the day teaching her how to latchhook. Remember that? It seemed that every doctor, nurse, social worker, etc came in and said oh yea, I did that when I was a kid. I guess we were doing a real old school craft. But she loved it. We worked until 930 tonight and then finished up watching the Bee Movie together. I love having time with her in the hospital because I can focus right on her. No other kids, chores, etc to distract me. Just me and her (and Daddy too)and it is very much quality time. She is now sleeping right next to me...and I have a lovely bed tonight on a recliner. (no couch this time)

Oh yea, there are always people visiting the kids here. Fireman, mascots, athletes, etc. We have even had professional wrestlers (they are scary looking). Well today we had the queen of England, a knight, and I am not sure what else. They are actors from the Renaissance Festival. They cast a little spell on her and turned her into a princess right in her hospital bed. But then again, we already know that she is a princess to us.


  1. Yes, a princess she is!!! Don't forget - you ARE strong, whether you feel like it or not. Your strength is not dependent upon the severity of the circumstance, nor upon your emotions, because it comes from God Himself. SO - that strength is ever-present at the foundation...God is faithful.

  2. Thank you for this post. I was hoping you would get a chance to write from the hospital but wasn't sure.Please don't lose your faith. You are strong; fear and tears mean you are being honest with yourself and that allows you to focus on the next day. My prayers today are for your stength, a quick infusion, and an even quicker recovery for ally's body.

  3. Geez...don't be afraid to cry...who wouldn't. It is a necssary outlet for all of the emotions you must have had watching your sweet girl in pain. You are one of the strongest people I know. So strong that I feel humbled in your presence. On a lighter note...tell Ally I went to grocery today and when I passed the Mountain Dew I thought of her. I think I will now always think of Ally when I see Mountain Dew. Hugs and love to all. Jenny

  4. I was just sharing with another parent the other day the exact thing you posted on your blog. If I could see into the future and know that Maggie would be okay, I would do all that we are going through without any complaints. Unfortunately though, I don't have that power and with me being a planner, it is devastating.

    I did want to comment about another post that you had made about being in the hospital during Halloween. I have heard that the hospital gets the kids involved and dressed up. Though it's not the same as being at home, they do try to make it special.

    We will be praying for Ally that her marrow is clear of leukemia cells and that your course of treatment will remain the same. Two years is a long time, but (though it doesn't seem like it), it will go by.

    We think of you all often. Take care.