Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Rainy Wednesday

Well my day started out by me flying out of bed to the screams of my daughter. It was 7:30 and she was yelling. I didn't even hear Jerad leave, and I was a bit confused. She had to go to the bathroom and thankfully got some relief from her constipation issue, but it is never a pretty sight when that happens. Painful. It got her so upset that she started gagging and also throwing up on the floor in front of the toilet. Her nose has been running so drainage issues are complicating matters. I am not one that handles vomiting very well. I just don't. Ask my husband, I virtually made him sign a prenuptial agreement when we got married that he is responsible for all puke. Unfortunately, having a cancer patient under our roof is not helping matters any. So, I also started gagging at this point and broke out into a cold sweat. Some caretaker I am.

We recovered from that, but Ally just didn't have a good day. I keep trying to map out how the chemo effects her. I just can't get it!!!! It is always different and they are always giving her different types of chemo. I just don't know exactly what is going on inside her little body. I do know she was down today. It seems to me that she does okay the first few days after chemo, but then her counts start bottoming out and so does she. It wouldn't surprise me if she needed blood again.

Her little friend Madden wanted to see her. I knew Ally felt bad and couldn't do much. So her sweet friend just brought over a movie and sat and watched it with her. Kids this age...they do know friendship. They do it and we don't even really have to teach them. It must be somewhat human nature. I am learning all about it and it is precious. Her friend Madison also wanted to see her, so she went to her house for a little bit. Always good to get out.

Other than that, we watched the rain pour down all day outside our bubble. It never stopped...all day. It was quite dreary and seemed especially dreary and depressing to me today. Where is summer anyway? Once while Ally was doing this:
I took the other two kids out to play in the warm July rain. My Gramma Ruth always says you have to get out each day to "blow the stink off" so we followed her motto. My favorite thing to do is photography. For obvious reasons this has taken the back seat lately. Lately I usually just point and click and I don't even bother with my "good" camera...but rather use one that fits in my back pocket. Today, I took out my baby, my camera, and tried to get some more artistic shots. Actually looking at the composition and the ISO and the white balance, etc. I haven't done it for months. A little rusty. When I am all done with this saga in my life...I am gonna learn. I am vowing right now that I am gonna read more, study more, maybe even get the master photographer Erin Cobb to do an online class or something. But for now, I was happy to just get a few fun shots and play a little. Grown ups need to play too.
Baby Girl, and I love her curls!...a bit skeptical of the rain and lurking in the garage
Evan making the most of the puddle at the end of the driveway..I was trying to catch the little droplets in my shot.
Soon to be five years boy.
He loved the rain today. At least somebody did!
And thus, I will cease complaining about the rainiest of days. Sorry. And I will share an excerpt from the great poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (remember him?) which reminds me that if it were sunny every day, then we would never appreciate the sunny days.

Be still, sad heart! and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Into each life some rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary.


  1. Jerad mentioned to me that she got some relief today--he neglected to mention the vomiting episode though! My word what a morning. Sorry about that. Hopefully she was better after all that. Here she is again like me--she gags when she has too much drainage. Gavin can attest to that.

    Great shots, I love them all!

  2. You will probably never figure out how she is going to react. We have to just hope for more good days than bad and cherish them.
    I love the sweet,sweet pic of her sleeping.
    Fun rain shots too!
    I love Evan's huge raincoat :-).

  3. Well my dear, I live in the sun pretty much 365 days a year (AZ) and I do NOT appreciate it. Send me the rain any day. Your puddle pics are beautiful-- such darling kiddos. Glad you are taking some time to do something you enjoy. That is so important right now.

    All serious things aside, picturing you gagging while poor Ally struggled going to the restroom while ALSO vomiting AND dealing with a runny nose does allow for a little chuckle. Though it may not have been funny today, I trust that this will make for a good read once this is all over.

    Hugs and prayers,


  4. So glad you got a shot of Ally's Bobo up next to her face. It is often where I see it. Bobo must earn some type of award for loyalty these days. I love that innocence.

    I also love that you got your camera out and took some rain shots. My favorite photos: Ally/Bobo and Carly's beautiful curls. Now I'm inspired...

  5. Janel,
    that was a fantastic post. I haven't read that longfellow verse for ever. thanks for the reminder.
    i can't handle puke either, and it goes all the way back to 1st or 2nd grade...i was riding the bus to Shaw Elementary and someone farted. I couldn't stand the smell, so I puked. And it was Cherrios from that morning. Then I puked again from my own puke! Tyler always makes fun of me and our prenup says he has to clean anything that stinks too.
    Hang in there with Ally's ups and downs. The chemo has to affect her because that means that it's getting the bad cells too. Wish it were easier....

  6. I love your pictures, and have followed this blog from the start. Thanks for letting us "in" to your world. You are a beautiful, descriptive writer, and it shines through in this blog. Prayers and strength are with all of you! Love Molly (Miss Lisa's Sister).

  7. That was an awesome post. I loved the pics. and the poem. Very special. I admire that you are the kind of mom to let your kids go out in the rain - not worried about messes! That is so cool. So glad and praising God that the infection is cleared up. Wonderful news. Give all a kiss from me - I miss you guys.


  8. I love the photographs! You are very talented. Keep taking a few moments for you each day. Hugs to Alley.

  9. Love those curls - and there is nothing like a little boy playing in a rain puddle - great captures. And Ally looks so peaceful, sleeping with her Bobo all pulled up and tucked around her. Sweet shot!
    I have never done puke either. I gag and choke and get the dry heaves. That was always Don's job. So I hear ya on that one.