ANC is 680

Ally had a great day today. She was as normal as I have seen her in a long time. She ate so so much. When she is feeling good, that appetite stimulant (megace) really works. For example, here is her foods for today: 2 eggs + 2 pieces of cheese + 1/2 english muffin. Then banana-mango yogurt smoothie (mine, which she promptly stole), then a turkey and salami sandwich. This was all before lunch. For lunch she had some Chinese. A little bit later a snack of hot chocolate with a cookie. Another snack of mashed potatoes (i know, weird). Dinner was a full helping of manicotti with fruit salad and a piece of bread. (thank you Suzanne Duplain/Stacy Sheets) Followed by dessert. Then another turkey sandwich before bed. And still saying she was hungry. Whew. I was preparing food all day long, but no complaints here. She has to make up for a lot of lost time. A week ago, I would have been happy with one turkey sandwich all day long.

I took her in for her blood test this afternoon. That brave girl doesn't even cry anymore. I think her sister gets more upset than her just watching it. The results are in and her ANC only hit 680. So, as I said yesterday, I was going to let this determine our fate. It has to be 750 to start the chemo. Chances are we could have pushed them a little and her ANC will likely be 750 by Wed morning. She probably could go. But they didn't really give me that option and we are scheduled to go in on Monday morning to start a new round. Another delay, but I am looking at it as a bit of a Thanksgiving gift for us. We can enjoy the holiday and each other a bit more and then we will collect our strength and start the next round on Monday.

We are a bit concerned with Mondays. Jerad and I think it may be a harder day for us to handle than our typical Fridays. I think it will be Monday for a while now. (next two months?) We are concerned that it will be harder to get help to watch the other two kids, but I am sure it will somehow workout. It always does. We may have to rely more on our friends and less on Jerad's family.

The Monday schedule may also be harder for Ally to try to attend school. If she is in any pain, then Tuesday is out too. So she may be able to get a couple of days in. Then again, she hasn't been to school in a month and half now. For the first time today, I felt she was good enough to go to school. But I wouldn't let her go for fear of her picking up an illness and being in the hospital for Thanksgiving. Maybe next week? I just don't know. No matter what, we are still counting our blessings that we are at home. No hospital to contend with.

And that being said, it is amazing how much better I feel now that I have had a few days at home and have gotten a few full nights of sleep. This is how people are supposed to operate. I am just always flying by the seat of my pants. But the last few days, I finally feel some small sense of control. The two months worth of mail, voicemails, etc have been gone through...we have cleaned up all the frantic messes made when we were gone and I even bought something at the store today and used a coupon. Coupons, now there is something to laugh at...time to clip a coupon? a list? a planned visit to the store? Unheard of. I am even going to try to work tomorrow...with Tuesday being my "normal" workday.

But........normal won't last for long. I know it. It will be pulled out from under me again soon and I will fall back down. So now I will just be thankful for what I do have. As I always should be. And I did save $1 on laundry detergent today, so there.

PS One item I forget, but posting later...I am NOT, repeat NOT, caught up on my emails. My inbox says I have, um, something like 5000 in there. Yep. I am seriously not kidding about that. I should take a picture just to prove it to you. I have a little bit of an issue with email....it is called "never deleting" but I also have not been responding too well to email either. So please, if I owe you one, just give me a little time. I will hopefully find your needle in my haystack.